The People In Your Neighbourhood: Peter Neill

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In late 2009 my then fiancé and I decided we'd get married in Ireland. The problem is, once you start mentioning to Irish suppliers, dress makers, photographers (etc) that you'd be procuring their services for a wedding, two things happen - first, the price suddenly has an additional zero added to it, and secondly, you're bombarded with traditional conceptions of what an Irish wedding is supposed to be.

I spent months wading through website after website of Irish wedding photographers (astonished at how many didn't even have websites, just phone book listings). All of them the same. All. Of. Them. The same posed photos, the same pic with mum and dad, with his mum and dad, with auntie so-and-so, uncle whatshisname, and so on.

Peter Neill Photographer, the People in Your Neighbourhood
My Wedding by Peter Neill
Then I came to Peter Neill. But it was not his wedding photography that struck me, in fact I can't actually remember seeing any of his wedding work. Instead it was his concert and event photography that drew me in. Having photographed concerts and events myself, I know it's not easy, but Peter had managed to master capturing key moments in amongst the constant movement and changes in lighting.

Right from the get-go I knew this guy would be able to take our alternative (in the Irish sense of the word) wedding and give us some truly memorable images as a keepsake. Turns out, I was right.

Despite the wonderful job he did, it was clear weddings weren't Peter's passion, and although grateful for the wedding work he has done he admits the stress associated with it started to take its toll. 'It was when that started to happen, I knew I had to make a change', Peter tells me, but is quick to acknowledge the learning curve wedding photography afforded him.

'Firstly, it taught me to think fast, you have to be aware of everything and then commit one hundred per cent to a decision if you are going to get the shot', says Peter. 'Secondly, it taught me to be more creative. I know it almost sounds counter intuitive, but because I was doing so many weddings, in an effort to keep interested I was looking at more and more alternative ways to capture a moment. That's why I enjoyed your wedding so much,' awww, shucks, ' you live and breathe creativity and it set me free in your wedding, so to speak'.

Doing wedding work also showed Peter that it just wasn't the place for him, long term. 'I learned that I was not going to be able to stay creative if I stayed in weddings, at least not to the extent that I wanted to be. Simply put, weddings were killing my love for the medium'. I can understand why. '[That said], I do think if I had stayed in wedding photography there was enough of a market for my style, but a move abroad would probably have helped'. And move he did, to London, but not for weddings, rather to follow the dream of concert photography.

Peter Neill Photographer, the People in Your Neighbourhood
Imelda May by Peter Neill
When I first met Peter, he was not a full time photographer, working a day job in IT. It was the global economic crisis, which hit Ireland particularly hard, that made Peter take the plunge into photography. 'I had to make a decision about whether I would be doing something sensible or work in an area that I was passionate about. I was passionate about photography, so I made the same leap many people do, and I decided to go into wedding photography'. To make it work, Peter had the benefit of his IT background to guide him, 'I had to use every aspect of my previous experience, such as web development, online marketing, loss leader promotions etc'.

'Now that I work in concert photography, that journey is [still] not over, though I do feel it's reaching the point that it will [soon] be my only income. For anyone considering a leap like this I recommend it, but boy it's tough'. Peter is realistic, and tells me that from making the jump, building his business and maintaining interest in his work is a round the clock effort. 'These days I think the biggest factor is social media, you have to be damn good at it to stand a chance right now'. 

Peter Neill Photographer, the People in Your Neighbourhood
Coldplay by Peter Neill
Pursuing his love of photography has not been without risk, with Peter, his wife and daughter making the tough decision to move away from their home, family and friends in Ireland and take a chance on London. 'We took a gamble, to see if I could go further in concert photography. I was hitting a ceiling in Ireland and I knew that I had to move to London if I was going to be noticed by the decision makers. Up until that point I had been doing mostly free photo work for promoters in return for portfolio and although I started to get noticed by some bigger bands, the creative directors, producers, labels etc had their offices in London'. The difference since arriving in London has been huge, 'one difference is their outlook, there is an understanding that good work is worth its pay. Sadly this was missing in Ireland and at the highest levels this attitude creates a problem'. Unfortunately, Ireland is not the only place where getting paid is a struggle for photographers and other creative professionals.

Placing a bet on London appears to be paying off for Peter, who is now considered a 'local' by the labels, has been busily establishing relationships with the creative decision makers and taking up new opportunities, 'due to these [efforts] I have added Ennio Morricone, Gary Barlow, The Script and Justin Timberlake to my list of regular clients', and in recent weeks Peter could be found photographing Depeche Mode. Jealous, much?

Peter Neill Photographer, the People in Your Neighbourhood
Bono by Peter Neill
When I asked Peter about how he first came to concert photography he graciously acknowledges the help he has had along the way, 'my big break came due to one man, Steve Averill. I had gone after an IT contract in the office where he worked just so I could meet him'. For those not in the know, Averill named U2 and has had a lot to do with their design work, including most of their album covers. 'Shortly after meeting him, before I ever shot a gig, I showed him a few pics I had taken by sneaking a camera into events, and begged him to help me get a chance to shoot U2. He made a few calls and soon after that I had my first gig, shooting U2 in Sheffield! So, I owe my career to both Steve and U2 and I'm very grateful to both'.

'I discovered that the medium of concert photography has only one brief: shoot your heart out', which suits Peter down to the ground. 'This was made all the more real for me recently when talking to Justin Timberlake's creative director. I asked him what he wanted from me and he said: I just want you to go nuts, do what you love, have fun and do what you always do, that's what I want'.

Peter Neill Photographer, the People in Your Neighbourhood
The Script by Peter Neill
No pressure, huh? 'The only times when I've felt pressure is when I've created it myself', something I'm sure many photographers and creatives will find familiar, as often we can be our own worst enemies. 'At this level the artists seem to understand that they need to let you do what you do and not try to dictate. They also value you as an artist in your own right'. What about the challenge of working with the unpredictability of concerts - the light, the movement, everything that's going on around you - thankfully, Peter says, you're not expected to produce volume, just quality, 'so if I can give them a great bunch of shots they love, they're thrilled'.

There are already some pretty big names on Peter's clientele list, but does he ever get starstruck? 'My most starstruck was probably meeting Jessical Biel when I met with Justin Timberlake the first time. Simply because I didn't know he was married and I didn't expect to meet her. However, I'm very used to keeping my composure at this point and can contain the inner scream!' And this, fellow readers is Peter in a nutshell, he's talking to international pop sensation Justin Timberlake and is internally screaming at meeting his lovely wife, Jessica Biel.

Peter Neill Photographer, the People in Your Neighbourhood
Gary Barlow by Peter Neill
Any other special moments on the journey so far? 'There have been so many, but the funniest has to be one that occurred last October in New York. I was working for The Script at a gig in Radio City and had an AAA pass, meaning I could go anywhere. About half way through the gig I went up one of the side walkways, which is like a path up the side walls of the venue. This security guard who had not been briefed on who I was legged it up after me to drag me down. That's not so bad in itself, except that some dumbass decided to point a spotlight at me so the whole crowd could see. Mortified!' I can just imagine Peter as an old man telling that one to the grandkids!

I like to think that we (my husband and I, and our wedding) had some hand in the beginning of something big, but let's face it, Peter is two things: one of the nicest blokes you'll meet and a very talented photographer, so he probably would have made it on his own anyway.

You too can check out his work and join the Peter Neill appreciation club via his website, on Facebook, Twitter and YouTube.

-Stevie O'C

Duran Duran by Peter Neill

Alice Cooper by Peter Neill

Slash by Peter Neill

The Script by Peter Neill

Peter Neill Photographer, the People in Your Neighbourhood
The Script by Peter Neill



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Haganai (I Don't Have Many Friends) Reviewed

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Haganai (I Don't Have Many Friends) follows the story of Kodaka, a teenage boy with sandy blonde hair, who transfers to St Chronica’s Academy mid-year. Kodaka manages to immediately get all of his classmates offside through a series of misinterpreted events that make him come across as physically and sexually aggressive. At St Chronica’s he meets Yozora, whom he interrupts mid-conversation with her imaginary, and only, friend. What Kodoka doesn’t know is that he has already met Yozora, but not as he’d recognise her.

Haganai I Don't Have Many Friends Anime Review

Kodaka is generally harmless despite the perception that he’s a bully, while Yozora is a very angry young lady. Having no real friends, she starts the extracurricular Neighbour’s Club, initially with the intention of attracting Kodaka, but soon others begin to join as well. One of the first is Sena the headmaster’s daughter, she is attractive and blonde and therefore the subject of the leering eyes of her male classmates. She’s the token cheesecake, and like Yozora, Sena has no friends of her own.

Sena and Yozora do not get along, with Yozora apparently determined that they never will. In fact, Yozora is outright mean to Sena, giving her the nickname ‘Meat’, which Sena does not mind as she has never had a nickname before, figuring that a bad one is better than none at all. In the beginning their relationship is bearable because there’s the potential for it to get better, however by the end of the season the character of Yozora really begins to grate. She is so unconfident in herself that she needs to bully Sena at every opportunity, while poor Sena takes it, almost thankful for the attention. It’s a real shame, because there are some genuinely enjoyable moments that are destroyed by the relationship between these two.

Haganai I Don't Have Many Friends Review Anime

The rest of the club-members include Kobato, who is Kodaka’s sister and convinced she’s some sort of vampire; Yukimura, Kodaka’s stalker who for some reason thinks she’s a boy; Rika, the super-intelligent science-geek who is actually quite perverse and perverted, and who also has a tendency to speak of herself in the third person; and Maria, the ten-year-old nun responsible for supervising the club.

The first thirteen episodes follow the formation of the club and the various activities they employ to get to know each other better, after all the purpose of the club is to make friends. The final episode is the one that both bothered and interested me the most. The activity for the day is a round-robin story, during which the members take turns writing a page of the story, one after the other. It’s here that Yozora is particularly cruel to Sena, whom she writes into a rape scene. It’s portrayed as though Sena is being attacked and eaten by some fantasy monster, but it is both the idea and hearing Yozora dictate her words that turn the stomach. I know teenage girls can be cruel, but I would have hoped they wouldn’t go writing rape scenes about their supposed friends.

While true of the whole series, this final episode also seems to be the most self-aware and self-deprecating. When it comes to her turn, Rika, who herself has previously spoken of her own rape fantasies, writes an explicit mecha-on-mecha sex scene. When Kodaka points out that the story no longer makes any sense, Rika reminds him and the others that nobody actually cares, just as long as there’s a sex scene in the end.

Haganai I Don't Have Many Friends Review Anime

This, it appears, is exactly what Haganai is about. Nobody cares about what happens in between, as long as there’s some gratuitous wobbly booby shots along the way, and Haganai has a lot. I want to understand anime, I really do, and the more I think about it the more I realise that maybe Haganai is the best place to start when it comes to grown up anime. The characters are clear tropes of Japanese animation, and they know it. The look, feel and plot lines also have (blatant) hints of familiarity, from teenage girls in short skirted school uniforms, video games about relationships and sex, characters believing they are immortals from the underworld, exaggerated wobbly girl-bits (and nudity) and even a mecha-sex scene or two.

However, Haganai is desperately uneven. While not without some funny and almost tender moments, these are often overshadowed by the almost unrelenting nastiness of Yozora. Shame, because at the outset Haganai had potential.

Haganai: Season One Collection is available on DVD and Blu-Ray here through Madman Entertainment. It's rated M and contains sexual references, sexual violence and animated nudity.

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For the Love of The Doctor: Rob Lloyd Talks Doctor Who

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Just two more sleeps until The Doctor celebrates his 50th anniversary, and we finally get to see the much anticipated The Day of the Doctor. Well, one more sleep if you're here in Australia and plan to find yourself a gaggle of Whovians to stay up until dawn with.

In anticipation, we asked Rob Lloyd, actor, comedian, all round good guy, oh and massive Doctor Who geek to tell us about why he does and you should love The Doctor.

The Day of the Doctor, Doctor Who 50th Anniversary

Meet Rob


Hi, I'm Rob and I'm a Doctor Who fan. I've been a fan since I was 17, that was in 1996. Since 2006, a lot of people have told me I look like actor and Tenth Doctor, David Tennant. Combining these factors, for the last two years I have been touring Australia, and the world, with my Doctor Who themed solo comedy Who, Me.

Now people ask me to write about what The Doctor means to me. 

I'm also a fan of the film High Fidelity. Yes, yes, I know it was a book first. So in preparation for The Doctor's 50th anniversary on 23 November, I'd like to employ the Rob Gordon 'top five' format to convey what Doctor Who really means to this little, old fan.

Rob Lloyd talks Doctor Who

The Tenth Doctor's (Look-a-like's) Top Five: Doctor Who


Number Five: Discovering The Doctor


I got into Doctor Who quite late. I was 17 and it was my first year of university. I went to Charles Sturt University in Wagga Wagga (NSW's largest inland city). I was a big nerd...big shock there.

This meant I wasn't the type of first-year-uni kid interested in experimenting with alcohol, drugs or sex...so when the opportunity to hear about the entire history of Doctor Who from a new friend came about, I leapt at the chance to learn more.

I've been hooked ever since.

The main thing that really attracted me to The Doctor then, as now, was The Doctor's freedom. The Doctor can go anywhere and do anything. He is the architect of his own destiny, which, as a 17 year old nerd in the country, was very inspiring.

Number Four: Who Brings Us Together


For so long Doctor Who was very much a private passion. Especially when I moved to Melbourne in 2000, I literally had no one I could talk to about my love for The Doctor.

Now this was a time when the series was well and truly dead in the water, so I had to play my Who cards close to my chest.

However, with the return of Doctor Who to our screens in 2005, I was given the opportunity to attend a regular social event, where a group of about eight or nine fans would gather, eat pizza, watch the latest episode and discuss.

This was my first true experience of what it was like to be part of a fan community. We loved everything Who, and we loved it together. We enjoyed loving the good bits and adored hating the bad bits...exactly what being a fan is all about.

Number Three: Top Stories


Let's start with the gold, my favourite classic story, and then my favourite modern story.

My all time favourite classic story is Inferno. It's a Jon Pertwee (The Third Doctor) story at the end of his first season. Brilliantly written by Don Houghton, the story focuses on a drilling project destined to the centre of the earth, and ends with The Doctor slipping into a parallel dimension where we get to experience the joy of seeing evil alternate versions of familiar characters. It is a tight, fun, gritty and rather intense seven part adventure that I never tire of watching.

Jon Pertwee Third Doctor

As for the modern series...I'm going to surprise even myself with this choice...I have to pick Dinosours on a Spaceship.

I realise most people would expect a lauded episode like Dalek, Blink or The Doctor's Wife, but I have to say in all honesty, I just really love watching Dinosaurs on a Spaceship. And I do watch it. Over and over.

Dinosaurs on a Spaceship is the second adventure in Matt Smith's third season. Written by Chris Chibnall, it focuses on The Doctor gathering a gang of friends to help stop a spaceship from crashing into the earth. However, they get more than they bargained for when they find the precious cargo on board is...wait for it...dinosaurs!

Dinosours on a Spaceship Doctor Who

This is a high energy, fun, action packed, fun, occasionally sad, fun, sometimes dark, fun, hilarious, and overall fun adventure. Did I mention it was fun?

I know it won't be to everyone's taste, but then I'm not everyone.

Number Two: Worst Story


The Idiot's Lantern, enough said.

Number One: What Would The Doctor Do?


Doctor Who has been an overwhelmingly positive influence in my life.

Case and point, I work as a teacher when I'm not nerding-it-up professionally in front of an audience. I found it particularly hard in my first few months of full-time teaching, so much so that at my lowest point, I was prepared to leave the school I worked at, breaking my contract only one month into the six months I was supposed to be there.

I asked myself, what would The Doctor do? A mantra I still use every day I teach.

I'm not saying I'm a great teacher or even a good teacher, I just survive and try to pass on a positive influence to my students...very much like The Doctor does with the people he meets.

Doctor Who 50th Anniversary
 -Rob Lloyd

Tonight (22 November) Rob is hosting Bendigo Library and Discovery Centre's Night of the Doctor,  he'll be presenting The Darlek Double Feature at Melbourne's Astor Theatre on 30 November, and will be emceeing at the Lords of Time 2 convention in Sydney on 14 December.

This year Rob took his show Who, Me to the Whovention, Sydney; the Darwin Entertainment Centre; Lords of Time, Melbourne; Sydney Comedy Festival; Auckland Comedy Festival; Perth International Comedy Festival; the Adelaide Comedy Circuit and the Edinburgh Fringe Festival.

The Day of the Doctor airs on ABC1 at 6.50a, (AEDT), 5.50am (QLD), 5.20am (NT), 6.20am (SA, 3.50am (WA), and will be repeated at 7.30pm.

Various cinemas are hosting sessions of The Day of the Doctor on Sunday, check your local guide.


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Deep Sea and Foreign Going: A Review

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I must admit that a non-fiction book about shipping is not something I would ordinarily pick up to read. As Deep Sea and Foreign Going reveals, this is perhaps not a reflection of my interests but the low profile of the shipping industry in our everyday lives - even though it brings us '90 per cent of everything'.

Book Review Deep Sea and Foreign Going by Rose George

In an effort to find out more about an invisible industry that has such a significant role in bringing us the goods we use every day, UK writer Rose George boards the container-ship Maersk Kendal at the English port of Felixstowe. From here she travels through the Suez Canal and treacherous Somali waters, eventually finishing her journey in Singapore. Interviewing the ship's crew, captain, and various other players in the modern shipping industry - from chaplains to pirate negotiators - George has written a book that is both intriguing and informative.

Ships bring us everything from mobile phones to furniture, cars and food, but most of us know very little, if anything, about it. The book opens with a discussion of how the shipping industry has largely been removed from our everyday consciousness. This is partly because ports are no longer part of residential neighbourhoods, and in a post-9/11 world, security concerns make them nearly impossible to visit (when was the last time you saw a container-ship up close?). Even though we don't see it, the magnitude of the modern shipping industry is astounding - if all the containers of shipping company Maersk were lined up, they would stretch half way around the world.

It is no surprise then that this book taught me a lot about aspects of shipping I would normally not think about. For example, in many cases seafarers work for months at sea with very little contact with home, few recreation or support services and, until 2012, international standards allowed them to work a 98-hour week. In heartbreaking interviews the seafarers talk of their experiences with search and rescue missions at sea and offer anecdotes of modern shipwrecks, which although sad are nonetheless fascinating.

Deep Sea and Foreign Going by Rose George A Review
By evanblaser via Flickr
One aspect of modern shipping that perhaps more of us are aware of is the rise of piracy. As George travels through the Somali waters she gives a thorough insight into the dirty and desperate trend that in 2010, Harvard Business School called the 'best business model of the year'. Surprisingly, shipping companies are forced to negotiate with pirates using expert consultants such as John Chase, whose interview paints a chilling picture of the business. George finds that pirates are rarely prosecuted due to the mobile nature of witnesses and the need to find a nation willing to try them as incidents often take place in international waters. As a result, stamping out piracy is a real challenge.

Deep Sea and Foreign Going by Rose George, A Review
By Grolltech via Wiki.
Being an animal lover, one of the most disturbing revelations was the impact that the growth in the shipping industry, and our increasing intrusion on the oceans, is having on marine life. George's research describes how we are not just polluting the oceans with plastic and chemicals, but also with noise from thousands upon thousands of ships. This comes from the use of seismic surveys and echoes from fish finders, which disturb and disrupt marine animals that are sensitive to sound waves. Research shows that every ten years the noise from commercial shipping doubles, and that this increasing disturbance has effects on the communication and feeding habits of whales, dolphins, fish and other species.

Deep Sea and Foreign Going is a fascinating book if you want to know how your iPhone, television or even baked beans made it into your home, and the incredible stories surrounding its journey. Pick it up and give it a go, even if it is a topic that wouldn't usually be on your radar.

Deep Sea and Foreign Going: Inside Shipping, the Invisible Industry that Brings You 90% of Everything by Rose George is published by Allen & Unwin and available for purchase here.

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A Gentleman Geek's Guide to Wedding Planning

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Before you get all excited, this isn’t going to be the type of wedding that has the bride and groom dressed in super hero costumes. No lightsaber arches, no Vulcan hand gestures, and definitely no ‘so say we all’ (unless the best man decides the crowd is ready for it). 

Nope. My wedding is going to be recognisably a wedding, between two human people. But maybe, just maybe there’s room for a little geekery.

A man's guide to wedding planning - green arrow black canary wedding special
http://dc.wikia.com/wiki/Green_Arrow_and_Black_Canary_Wedding_Special_Vol_1_1
My future wife, Elizabeth and I have prepared our wedding in the knowledge that the majority of our respective family members are confused by capes and glowing swords, so instead we’ve opted for a relatively Loki (see what I did there?) affair.

You see, my lovely lady wife to be isn’t what you would call a geek. When we stated going out the only thing that could put her into that category at all was a love of Stargate. Make that all of Stargate! SG:1. Atlantis. All of it!

With that in mind, Elizabeth’s vision of her wedding day has always been free of comic book and science fiction influence. But that's where I come in.

When we started seeing each other I had already been engaged. A long and convoluted story of people being young and stupid, that engagement lasted three years and never went anywhere, finally ending quite badly. I accept the blame there. What this meant, though, was that when I did meet Elizabeth, the prospect of marriage was furthest from my mind.

The big change came when I realised this person, Elizabeth, was by far the only one I could possibly want to spend my life with. Now, marriage is not for everyone, but if one of you wants this and it’s important to them, well sometimes you just have to put their happiness before your own, and very loud, opinion.

So I proposed. And she said yes.

The condition, as it were, was that the wedding be a reflection of us both, not just a celebration of love and all that, but an expression of who we are as individuals as much as who we are as a couple.

And with that I got to add my little comic book touches!

The invitation to the engagement party was a mini-comic, the save-the-date was in the style of the Green Arrow, Black Canary Wedding Special, the invites featured Elizabeth and I wearing little bits of Superman and Wonder Woman costumes, and the Order of Ceremony booklet is an homage to the Green Arrow, Black Canary cover.

A Man's Guide to Wedding Planning
Elizabeth and Paul
My groomsmen and I will wear comic book cufflinks – Green Arrow, Green Lantern, John Constantine and Lex Luthor.

The flower girl will have a little Batman pin, although, importantly, she has offered to wear her full Batman costume should we change our minds at the last minute.

As for the flowers; the bouquets are made from paper, with a few flowers made out of comic book pages – don’t worry, none were first editions, or of even slight worth. And the table decoration; the vases will be filled with large paper flowers and lined with more comic pages. The place cards will be speech bubbles and thought balloons.

Collectively, these are things that together we decided would allow my personality to be reflected in our big day, without taking away from Elizabeth’s idea of her wedding day.

But it hasn’t all been easy. On some details I’ve had to ask Elizabeth to let me make my own decisions, and allow me to get to them in my own way. My suit, for example.

Originally Elizabeth wasn’t going to join me at the suit fitting. I knew what I wanted – a three piece grey suit with a green tie. Elizabeth came. I walked out with a two piece charcoal suit and a blue tie. The justification? It’s an outdoor wedding in summer, so the vest would be too hot, charcoal was more slimming, and the blue would match the bridesmaids. While these are all perfectly reasonable points that I would have eventually come to in my own good time I felt as though I was getting steamrolled before I had the chance to even think about it!

One thing that we did agree on at the outset was making a special point in the ceremony about our views on marriage. By law the celebrant has to say that ‘marriage is between a man and a woman’, which is total bullshit. While it is required, we’ve added out own little disclaimer, which works nicely but isn’t as vocal as I originally wanted. That said, telling the Liberals to go fuck themselves in the middle of my wedding ceremony probably isn’t altogether appropriate. In fact, my political views have already seen some relatives choose to boycott the day.

While some may say weddings are the bride’s special day and that the blokes should keep out of it, I think that by adding my own personal touches this has become one of the most memorable parts of our relationship.

I know that come 7 December, I will be a very happy man, surrounded by the people I love and the comics that I hold so dear.


Gentleman geeks guide to wedding planning
http://dc.wikia.com/wiki/Green_Arrow_and_Black_Canary_Wedding_Special_Vol_1_1

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Still Kinky

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You have been warned - this story is about going to a kinky sex party and contains swears. If you think this will make you want to send us angry emails then best you not continue and read this, this, or this instead.

Missed Part I? Read it here first.

We do a quick change in the unisex toilets, which consist of one cubical and three urinals (are you for reals?!). We swap suits and adorn them with [insert name of pharma-cum-beauty retailer who we really, really hope does not sell products that are tested on animals] logos, and accessorise with bunny ears and noses.  A dude wearing green trousers and applying orange body paint to his top half turns and says ‘I don’t get it’ in a voice that sounds like he’s borrowed it from a hipster. Yeah, well, right back at ya buddy!

Entourage: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0387199/
Once inside the actual party it is immediately apparent that there is nothing to worry about. The place is packed, but the vibe is good. To give you some kind of visual context, imagine what it might be like if you were in a room with all of Lady Gaga’s friends, all in full costume…but they're nice.  Everyone has dressed up. There's lots of silver, and lab coats over suspenders, and there is a widespread Breaking Bad influence. But given I’m extremely paranoid about appearing as a voyeur I do my best not to look at anything, let alone anyone, for too long.

We lost No.2 during the change and DJ Tyler Durden needs to do his networking thing, so I head to the bar. I wait patiently, but some guy in a dentist jacket pushes in. ‘Dude I’m a giant friggin bunny, don’t play the ‘oh I didn’t see you there’ card’, I want to say, but before I can get my defensive bitch on, I am fortunately (or unfortunately as it turns out) interrupted by a stranger in a space suit.

‘So you’re an experimental bunny?’ raising an eyebrow.
‘Indeed I am’. Fuck! Why is flirting my nervous default position?
‘And does bunny like to experiment?’ Fuck! Fuck! Fuck-ety! Fuck! Why didn’t I go to that fucking consent workshop! How the heck do I say no?

It’s obvious that I’m still a bit apprehensive. If I was anywhere else I would tell him to piss off but because this place has such an emphasis on consent, I feel obliged to be respectful in my rejection…you know like we all should, really, always.

‘Ummmm, bunny likes a scratch’ I said as I scratched my left shoulder awkwardly with my left hand. It’s the best I could come up with on such short notice. The onesie was itchy, but more importantly why was bunny talking in the third person all of a sudden? Thankfully I spot my bunny-in-crime nearby and hop in his general direction. He has witnessed the awkward exchange at the bar and we decide that if asked again, we’re going to say that we’re plushies (Google it, or don’t), and hope that works as a decoy.   

Bunny onesies for kinky dance party

At 11pm the cabaret begins featuring a cheeky compere, a lesbian comedian (literally all her jokes were about her being a lesbian, all of them) and a lizard inspired burlesque dancer. The removal of her g-banger is apparently the cue that the Playroom is open for business. Ever been out somewhere that there’s a couple in the corner getting it on and you just want to yell ‘get a room’? Well this place has one.

We head outside for air - the onesies are hot! When we return. the dance floor that was packed to the rafters minutes before is now half empty. Ah. The Playroom. We have a dance, but the music is not really grabbing us. And with that our night becomes a pattern of outside, bar, give the dance floor a go, rewind, and restart.

Each time we walk outside we pass the thick black curtain that cordons off the Playroom the heat emanating from it seems to intensify. There is a woman outside who I would conservatively estimate is a size 20. She’s wearing a leather skirt. I’ll repeat; she’s wearing a leather skirt (nothing else). It’s held up by a clasp looped around her neck and is carrying a taxidermy tool. Instantly taking a liking to my rabbit self, she clips her tool into the zip of my onesie and draws down. ‘Yeah that’ll do’ I say when she gets to around my belly button, not because I think I’m about to become her stuffed bunny fantasy, but because I’m actually wearing the least sexy underwear I own and this is really not the place for me to be flashing my sensibles. 

Back inside, the dance floor continues to be empty, which is disappointing for those that actually want to dance…vertically, or those who are out of options on their horizontal dance card. Thank gawd when 2:30am rolls around and I can finally get my proper dance on. Unfortunately this means I have lost my dancing partner to the decks and as No.2 hates drum and base I regularly lose him to nicotine.  Fuck it! I dance my tail off…literally, as the safety pin that is holding my tail together gives way.

Throughout all this, I realised a few things about myself. First, I am really not bothered by people having their tits or bits out. In fact, I hardly noticed it and despite the initial self induced awkwardness, I didn’t experience the where do I look dilemma. Brilliant! A sign I’ve matured. Second, I can’t help but think ‘does having sex really require this much effort? Is it so lame playing at home with your partner that you need this whole shin dig with 300 other people? And if you don’t have a partner, is it that hard to pull?’ That said, I don’t think that’s actually the point here.

Perhaps it’s my age,  perhaps it’s my Virgo rising, but when it comes to bumping uglies I adopt the ‘fresh is best' policy and I can’t think of a better mood killer than a pre-heated post-coital cushion, that is still warm from someone else’s (and then some) body. I am also most definitely a monogamist, and I don’t like to share. Thankfully neither does DJ Tyler Durden. He’s an only child.

While there is sexual mayhem happening all around, neither of us feels the need to mack on in the middle of the dance floor, nor do we need to explore whether we are actually plushies after all. I did however, feel we connected on level that is beyond anything physical, sexual or even emotional. That night it became very apparent that we share a simple and unspoken connection, that we’re very much on the same page, we can communicate with just a look, and have a lot of fun with each other, in whatever form that may look like. And that, ladies and gentlemen, I have on good authority, is way more wicked than being tied up, smacked, poked, stroked or wheelbarrowed (Google it, or don’t, but if you do, in your own time and not at work) in public.                      

Having said all that, I also get it. Totally. It’s not that I lack sexual desires or fantasies, it’s just I don’t need to explore it in that forum…well not at this point in time anyway. Just because it’s not my thing, does not mean it is not someone else’s. It’s an exhibitionist’s dream, and it is obviously very liberating. Some people just like to dance around naked and this setting gives them the ability to do that without the threat of being groped or worse.

In a world where no is too easily ignored, and attitudes of she was asking for it are apparently the norm, this experience was extremely refreshing and precious.  What I loved most was how safe I felt in an environment where anything goes. It does not matter your size, your age (as long as you’re over 18), your preference, fetish or fantasy. The freedom to express yourself is celebrated, without the fear of judgment or the menacing presence of predatory creeps. It also highlights for me how mainstream media distorts the characteristics of sexual expression. I cringe to think that there are men and women alike that have modeled their own explorations after Samantha Jones's. And no, it wasn’t a room of Christian Grey’s either.     

All of that said, I’m not going to lie, this was the first time I had heard DJ Tyler Durden deejay live, having missed him over the festival season, so experiencing him create something I was really enjoying had me, funnily enough, wanting to go for it, as they say, like rabbits. But in the moment I was also really enjoying being in my own little dance world and feeling the freedom to dance as if no one was watching. Bliss. We could save the rest for when we got home.

So will I go to the next one? Well Mum, the jury is still out but I would certainly encourage others to go because it is an unforgettable experience, and hey I didn’t even have any sexy time! And that’s the key, neither do you. But if you’re going to head along to a kinky party, here are my tips for not just surviving, but having a great time:

* Keep your mind open.
* Know that opening your mind does not mean you need to open your legs. You don’t have to do anything that you don’t want to.
* Get into the spirit. Dressing up can really help you get out of your own head; it shakes things up and helps you get into the groove with everyone else. 
* Don’t get too intoxicated, that’s no fun for anybody. 
* Take someone you trust with you.
* Remember to laugh and just have fun.
* Don’t be shy, talk to people, they won’t bite – unless, of course, you want them to. 
* Know your boundaries and respect those of others.
* Basically, follow the fucking rules!



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Thor: The Dark World Reviewed

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I’m really not sure why Thor: The Dark World is getting such mixed reviews. What is it people go to Marvel movies for? A hero? A villain? A love interest? A world at risk? A generic-y storyline bolstered by explosions, fight scenes, superheroes and space aliens? Oh for the love of clichĂ©s! If you answered yes to any or all of these, then you really have no excuse for being anything other than delighted with this latest instalment in the Avengers compendium.

Thor 2 The Dark World Thor and Loki A Review

I’m mildly bothered by the fact that there seems to be this growing impression that we can’t just go to a film for the sake of enjoyment. For enjoyment purposes, only, nothing deeper or more meaningful. Why does it matter that the first half of the film is exposition aimed at a more superficial audience that needs everything explained to them? Why does it matter that this is a pure marketing ploy to pull in a broader audience? Why does it matter that you haven’t yet realised that as a comic book fan this film is not actually for you, specifically, but for the masses?

As far as plots go, this one is pretty much the off-the-shelf variety. Once upon a time there was a war between the Asgardians and the Dark Elves, the latter of which were all but wiped out except for the most important ones who escaped and have remained in a state of suspended animation. Loki (Tom Hiddleston) is in prison, Thor (Chris Hemsworth) is sad after having neglected his love life to clean up after his brother, and Jane Foster (Natalie Portman) has moved to London. As the nine realms move towards alignment, Jane somehow manages to be in the wrong place at the wrong time and is infected by the Dark Elves’ weapon of choice, the Aether. Cue the awakening of head Dark Elf Malekith (Christopher Eccleston) who now wants to bring the nine realms into darkness; the motivation of Thor who wants to save Jane (oh, and the nine realms too, if you wouldn’t mind); and the bringing together of two brothers torn apart by the selfish actions of one.

I’ve read that some are calling it The Lord of the Rings in space, but for me it felt more akin to Doctor Who, with the treatment of dashing between worlds like the Doctor’s movement through wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey. Also Malkith’s band of not-very-merry elves would not have been entirely out of place beside the Silence, Ood or Cybermen.

Thor 2 The Dark World Review Dark Elves

In any case, by now you’ve probably guessed that Thor: The Dark World is not a perfect example of cinematic excellence. It is a little disjointed in parts, and it does feel like two films pasted together somewhere in the middle. The tone of the first half differs from the latter, as it hastily tries to deliver the necessary exposition (which, actually may not be so necessary), while the second half seems to take itself far less seriously and almost becomes a romp. That said, I still left the cinema feeling as though my tight-arse-Tuesday $12 ticket was worth it.

It seems all the reviewers are talking about Tom Hiddleston’s Loki, and really why wouldn’t you? He does appear to be having great fun playing Loki, with the character in the latter half of the movie actually beginning to live up to his mischief-ness through a series of well-timed quips and the provoking of his overly serious half-brother. Chris Hemsworth does what he can with Thor, who is a slightly more rounded character in this second film. In the first, I found him severely lacking and one dimensional, but here there’s a little more to Thor, with my favourite scene the one apparently recommended by Joss Whedon – topless Thor! It’s not the topless-ness I loved rather how Hemsworth’s overly buff chest and arms are paired with what I have come to call ‘Thor-thinking-face’. It’s only a few seconds, but its inclusion is worth it even though it is entirely gratuitous.

Thor 2 The Dark World Review Thor and Heimdall

If I’m honest, Natalie Portman’s Jane Foster is the biggest disappointment. In fact, I’m beginning to question Portman’s talent altogether as her portrayal of Jane in both films leaves a lot to be desired. She spends most of the film either actually unconscious or acting that way. While others have criticised it, I actually enjoyed the interludes of camp from Kat Dennings’ Darcy Lewis, but I did think Idris Elba as Heimdall was a little underutilised – I get the feeling there should have been slightly more of him, but it may have been left on the cutting room floor. Christopher Eccleston’s Malekith is foreboding and driven. It is clear that he has waited a long time to do this one thing and that is his focus, which Eccleston executes nicely from beneath piles of prosthetics and makeup.

One issue I did have with Thor is entirely a side issue and not something I blame this film, specifically, for. I feel that the portrayal of intellect and science is increasingly sidelined in film and many other forms of popular culture. Thor, here, is a symptom. Jane Foster is presented as being muddle headed and under-confident, yet it is her idea that saves the world, Thor just happens to assist in the facilitation. Similarly, Stellan Skarsgard’s Erik Selvig is outright mad, but again, it is his scientific knowledge that contributes significantly to the survival of not only the populations of earth, but of all the nine realms. This fact is all but sidelined, especially as it goes unrecognised and unrewarded.

Overall, expect little and have yourself a good time with Thor: The Dark World - in cinemas now.


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A Taste of Tasmania: Five of the Best + One

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On a recent trip to Hobart I was amazed at the extent and quality of locally grown and made produce available in Tasmania. To be honest I'm a little ashamed of my lacking knowledge in this respect. I live in Melbourne, Victoria, the closest neighbouring state to Tassie, and yet I had no idea (note, this is not to say there isn’t amazing produce right here in Victoria, it’s just that I’m yet to get to that)!

I felt fortunate to be in amongst the growers and producers as I wandered the tents at the Salamanca Markets, and was impressed by the availability of these wonderful treats in and around Salamanca. When I go back, I will be sure to take an extra case just for filling with Tassie owned and grown goods, but for now, here are five of the best that I experienced (note: I did not attend the addresses listed with the exception of Jackman & Ross - I bought these products from the Salamanca Markets and various other stockists in Hobart).

Taste of Tasmania Produce Food Drink

Bruny Island Cheese Co

1807 Main Road, Great Bay, Bruny Island

It’s going to sound corny, but when you pick up a Bruny Island cheese you know it has been made with love, passion and care. After a tasting at their market stand I was hard pressed to choose just one cheese to take away with me. I did eventually settle on the 1792, which proceeded to completely stink up our little apartment bar fridge! This soft washed rind cheese is quite pungent, but comparatively mild to taste.

Bruny Island Cheese Co began life in 2003 and is the baby of premiere cheese maker Nick Haddow. They use milk sourced from ethically kept cows and goats, and are the only legally recognised raw milk cheese producers in Australia. Incidentally, for me, the raw milk cheese very narrowly lost the coin toss with the washed rind that I ended up buying.

Bruny Island Cheese Taste of Tasmania

Jackman & McRoss

57-59 Hampden Road, Battery Point

At the Salamanca Market I bought a loaf of sourdough, which, unbeknownst to me at the time, turned out to be from Jackman & McRoss. Shortly thereafter my husband received a message from a friend telling us that we could not leave Hobart without paying at least a fleeting visit to that very bakery at Battery Point! Serendipitous, much?

I described Jackman & McRoss in my earlier post on Hobart, as it is definitely somewhere I would recommend for breakfast, lunch or even just for coffee and a treat. I went to Tasmania to slow down, and Jackman & McRoss helped me to do this. The atmosphere is calm, the eating areas are mostly bright and airy, and the food will satisfy the eye, the taste buds and the tummy.

If you want to take away, and you will, they have a vast array of fresh breads, pastries sweet and sour, biscuits, desserts, savoury tarts and more.

Jackman & McRoss Food Tasmania

Wellington Apiary

112 King Street, Sandy Bay

There’s certainly something special about Tasmanian honey, particularly the raw honey. It’s raw because it has literally been removed from the hives and put in a jar. Well, almost. It means it hasn’t been heated to assist the straining process, which is when any excess wax or other impurities are removed. 

I took home Wellington Apiary’s Leatherwood honey, which I have no idea how to describe. It’s a thick cloudy honey with a spicy tone to it, and a taste like home, whatever that means to you. Apparently Leatherwood honey is the taste of Tasmania as that’s where the tree is native. Leatherwood honey is also part of the Slow Food Foundation for Biodiversity’s Arc of Taste, which aims to draw attention to significant produce and their potential extinction. In that case, maybe I should keep my jar sealed and to myself, for now.

Wellington Apiary has been around since 2009, and is a business built around a passion for sustainability, the products of nature, and raw honey.

Produce of Tasmania Wellington Apiary Leatherwood Honey

The Franklin Cider Company

3118 Huon Highway, Franklin

Tasmania is traditionally known as the Apple Isle, and what better to do with apples than make cider! Thankfully there are plenty of choices when it comes to Tassie grown and made apple cider, with a few producers likely to be well known to you. I chose a smaller producer during an evening in the pub. Frank’s.

I can be picky about my cider, however I was pleasantly surprised by the taste of Frank’s Summer Apple, which is neither too sweet nor too dry, it’s just right. Yes, that does make sound like the Goldilocks of cider, but that’s the most apt description I can give. Made from tree-ripened apples (and pears, they also do a pear cider) and based around the credo of ‘don’t muck around’ the produce coming out of Franklin Cider Company is clearly reflective of the natural ingredients and philosophy that goes into it.

Franks Cider from Franklin Cider Co, Tasmania
https://www.facebook.com/FranksCider/photos_stream

William McHenry & Sons Distillery

229 Radnor Road, Port Arthur

Who knew Tasmania made whisky? Not me, apparently. However, the discovery that indeed they do came as a pleasant surprise for my whisky snob, *cough* connoisseur, husband. And not only whisky, but single malt whisky. Even better.

While I don’t drink whisky myself I could appreciate the quality of the Three Capes Single Malt through the pleasantly warm fudge-y caramel scent it gave off. That is a scent of comfort.

William McHenry & Sons Distillery is apparently the southern-most family run distillery in the world, and being in Tasmania it's about as far away from those traditional whisky makers in Scotland as you can get! But with a similar climate, it’s more alike than you’d think. The distillery uses pure spring water direct from the cold Tassie ground, and currently also produces a vodka and a gin.

Three Capes Single Malt William McHenry & Sons Distillery, Tasmania
https://www.facebook.com/pages/William-McHenry-Sons-Distillery/120956014719430

And one for the road…


I have to admit, Country Women’s Association ladies tend to scare the bajesus out of me. I love to cook and bake, but I’m messy in the kitchen and so sometimes things work out, other times not, but never would they be to the super high standards of these ladies. While they frighten me I am equally in their awe. This is something that was confirmed when I popped into the Common Ground shop at the Salamanca Arts Centre and as a last minute decision threw two chunks of caramel fudge into my bag. 

Best. Decision. Ever.

Mrs 64 of the CWA, I solute you. This lady’s fudge is absolutely to die for. Solid on the outside it is soft and luxurious in the middle. The flavour is just sweet enough, and there is absolutely no grain in it at all. It is smoooooth. I won’t lie, I bought two and ate them both myself. No sharing this one!

Food and produce from Tasmania, Common Ground Hobart

-Stevie O'C

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